I Hate "Fun."

So the other "attraction" in Fargo is the "Space Aliens Grill & Bar."  I hate "fun," and by "fun" I mean things that are supposed to be fun, but aren't, like Dave & Busters and Parades and shit like that.  Dear readers, we went to this place for you, because we care.  As Danielle would say, it's our crime.  The floor was sticky, as I imagine an alien planet would be, and it was all kitschy, and not in an interesting way.  The toilets were black, so it was like you were peeing into a black hole, and they had black lights in the booth, so you could see your bra through your shirt, depending on what you were wearing. YAAAAY!  I had a "Martian Munchies" mini pizza, which supposedly had onions on it, but in Mars I guess onions are an indiscernible meat, so I had to pick all that off.  Both Lizzie and I had lunch regret, and spent our 4 hour to Duluth accompanied by our regrets.

So do you remember the Nintendo game "paperboy?"  That's what our drive to Duluth was like.  At every turn, there was a new old lady with a cane jumping in front of us, trying to get us killed.  A deer ran in front of us, and Lizzie managed to avoid it, and then a bunch of crows flew in our path, and Lizzie managed to avoid them too, and then a momma duck and her ducklings were like "NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO CROSS THE STREET," and Lizzie managed to avoid them too.  I think that ticket from the North Dakota PD really sharpened her skillz.  Seriously, though, Minnesota.  Stop it.